Sunday, 16 November 2008

Sugasm #152

HNT courtesy of An unassuming girl.

The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #153? Submit a link to your best post of the week by emailing me directly at radicalvixenatgmaildotcom Participants, repost the link list within a week and you’re all set.

This Week’s Picks
Sugarbutch Star: Maze - The Girl in the Red Dress
“She’s the kind of girl who brings out the worst in me.”

treat or … fuck
“He looked like I had just given him a car for Christmas and he gently took my hand and led me upstairs. ”

A Life Exposed and Amplified
“We were breaking the rules and being dirty.”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
Sugar Bank

Editor’s Choice
I told him I loved him. He gave me a pen.

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday

(Sugasm participants should re-post all the links above within a week. The following links may be excluded as long as you include all the above links.

Erotic Writing and Experiences
Break On Through
Eiffel Tower
Fast Jenny
A Few Orgasms Before Bed
Goodbye, my Love
Mexican Girlfriend
Mixing business and pleasure
Mistaken Identity

Sex Advice
How to Have Anal Sex with a Big Penis
Is Fantasizing Wrong?
Is Sex Without Oral a Dealbreaker? You Decide.
Lasting Longer in Bed

NSFW Pics, Videos & Audio
Georgia Jones wants to go for a ride
HNT. Forest Nymph
HNT! (One more cherry, popped.)
Kamila - The Restoration
More from the knee socks series
PSA: Breast Cancer Awareness

Sex Work
Dating Civilians 101

Sex News, Reviews, & Interviews
A New Twist on an Anal Sex Toy
On Tuesday, Vote for Equality

BDSM & Fetish
-3 Days
Bad Girl
The big dodge
Blind date: Impressions of a Dom
Dirty Boy
egg scissors
Do you want to cum? How bad?
Jake gets Punished in Spanking Movie
Kneeling In Style
Long Night in Thee Cow Shed
Marked: An Open Letter
Mistress by Proxy, part 2 : the slut
The New Bath Brush
Pimping him out
Pondering Piercings

Sex Humour
Friday Poem: Achy Achy Cunt

Thoughts on Sex and Relationships
Hubby’s Halloween Hit. Confession #167
The Space Between
Two women, two stories

Wednesday, 22 October 2008


For You ...

I fall for pain and the force that marks me. I thrill in being tugged sharply, harshly to my senses, but I'm no submissive: I relish the fight, the struggle not to be broken, taking each lash or bite or pinch with a sharp intake of breath and a hot rush of blood through my veins. I like those who are certain they can break me; they try so hard, for so long, leaving scratch upon bruise for my pleasure. My purpled souvenir from last Thursday is virtually faded now, sunk into my skin. No one else can likely see it, but I can hear the hushed vespers of its ghost haunting my skin and sinew. For days afterwards, I fingered your impression. I didn't cover it. I watch it fade slowly, hoping that by the time it had gone, you'd be back around to allow me another. You watch me ... I'll make a point of ruffling my hair off my shoulders, inviting you with the blank canvas of my smooth, long neck, my juicy ass or my soft, tanned back.

Nothing is blemished in my blemishes: I find no flaws in a flaw. Bruises, welts, lashes, burns, scars, stains, teeth marks, pinpricks, cuts: I crave and delight in them all.

The other night your eager thumb left a half-moon bruise on my mons, red and tender from holding tight to it while your fingers pumped in and out of my pussy. I stroked my fingers across it during the next day to feel the lingering soreness and remember where I'd been the night before. The marks you left on my neck that time were deepened by your other hand, pressing on my windpipe just enough to make me dizzy, leaving five indents of yourself in my skin. I remember this with the same stuttering breaths you caused then. They are the wardrobe door to my private Narnia. I look at them in the mirror, touch them, caress them. Someone else sees them, gasps, asks if I'm OK and I am straight back inside that fevered place you left me in. My body floats, I feel flushed and heady. My sexual memories are visceral and sensate; I am ever-willing prey to a swift assault of images, sounds and scents. Just one glance in the mirror and the room smells of you, of fresh perspiration on your velvet skin, musk and worn cotton. The slightest touch of this sore spot or that bruise and you're here: your eyes softly shut, full lips flushed, the coarse down of your carefully shorn face tickling my nipples and thighs.

So now you know why, next time I'm talking with friends, I'll pull my hair back on purpose, and make it look incidental. When someone asks who gave it to me, I won't voice your name. I'll smile suave and smug and coy, and shrug my shoulders -- knowing full well they'll know just who from my smirk alone, leaving them to imagine how or where or when I earned my colours.

Tuesday, 21 October 2008


Wow, so it's been a very long time since I've last written anything on here and I apologise sincerely!

To spare those of you who haven't been in contact and so don't know what happened from a long story, I will make my excuses quickly:

My blog was attacked by a Christian rights group who somehow were able to make it so that when people went to view my page, they were directed to another page warning them of the evils of sin and damnation and with images of Lot and his family in Gomorrah, amongst other pictures of the fires and demons of Hell! So I contacted kind Blogspot people who tried to sort it out and in doing so pulled down my blog for a long time whilst they fixed it.

I have to rush off now, but I will be back this evening with tales of what I have been up to.

I hope you are all lovely and well.
Lily x

Friday, 30 May 2008

The First Night

I finally have a day where I have no errands, no up-coming recitals to practise for, no work, no hassle, no nothing ... I am going to put my feet up, watch movies and catch up on blogging and eat ice-cream.

So this post is going back to the beginning to start with my very first client, an entire month ago ...

I had written a post here about my first booking which unfortunately didn't come to fruition, and after a while of reading silence from my inbox, I was feeling slightly apprehensive that maybe I was going about doing something the wrong way, or perhaps the blogging wasn't acceptable to those who knew about it, or any number of things.

But later, in the first week or so of april, I had an enquiry by a gentleman from France, who was coming to London on business. We spoke by email and on the phone and got on so well that by the time I met with him, it was as though I was meeting up for dinner with an old friend! I was very surprised that my first rendezvous would be so much more easy to approach then I had imagined - the fates must have been smiling down upon me to have brought me such a lovely, easy-going gentleman as my first client, with whom I could have animated, intelligent conversation over drinks with and take a stroll around looking at the beautiful London architecture, without a single awkward silence or uncomfortable feeling, right throughout the night.

We spent a really enjoyable weekend and, now that the post-encounter glow has passed, I am content that my choice to enter this world has been a good one. Perhaps I was lucky to find such a client, especially to begin with, or maybe it is only validation that my selection/screening process works well. Whichever it is, I am pleased and look forwad to seeing him again!

Despite what had been suggested to me by some, I don't feel used, ashamed, degraded, or guilty for my actions, I simply feel assured and aglow. The pleasure of the rendezvous was entirely mutual and, as I don't wish to air the dirty details, suffice it to say that we are still in touch and he has already re-booked!

Lily x

Wednesday, 21 May 2008

Sugasm #132

Bali Hai-HNT courtesy of Blue-eyed Vixen.

The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #133? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you’re all set.

This Week’s Picks
“The Church would have you believe that abstinence should be sufficient.”
“Despite my outward appearance, I still felt sexy as hell knowing what was underneath those misleading garments.”
“At the Dee & Apollo household, it’s early on Day 10 of the May Masturbation Challenge. ”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
(one from the vaults)

Editor’s Choice

See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

Friday, 9 May 2008

Art Personified

I have been so busy this whole month and I’m having trouble getting out the posts that I want to. But today I was watching
Miami Ink and it reminded me how much I have been wanting a tattoo for the last couple of years ~ I wanted to share that with you.

I have always wanted something that was an expression of myself, but I wouldn't want anything that could get in the way of my life or stop me reaching goals because of how people might judge me. Nothing is going to stop me doing something I want to do though, and myself, I wouldn't want anything that is intrusive on my body, just a piece of art that is personal to me.

I never used to be that into tattoos, I'm not terribly keen on full sleeve works or whole body pieces, but then again, I have seen 2 or 3 that took my breath away by their beauty ~ I do like works of art, and often that is what tattoos are ... when I started seeing tattoos that looked like that, I realised that they don't have to be brash, agressive marks and that for many people, they actually mean someting and can be truly beautiful - that is the type of art I would like on my skin; something meaningful to me ~ an outward mark of my inward self.

I was always aware that tattooists are very good artists, but watching Miami Ink has really impressed upon me the fact that they truly are graphic artists, fine artists, graffiti artists, modern artists, everything spun into one personable ball of talent, skill and artistic ability.

I have pretty much decided which tattoos I would like and where, which has been part of why it has taken me so long to decide to have a tattoo - I am so indecisive and I have so many ideas for tattoos and where each of them could go that I couldn't settle on which would be right for me, after all ... it is going to be there for ever! Now I know that I would like a little musical phrase/notes just below my left ankle, a hebrew word across the nape of my neck that symbolises my true self and my beliefs, and a similar, smaller version of the photo at the top of this post on my right foot.

I have to admit, I am slightly afraid of the pain and I'm guessing that, closer to the time, I will be very nervous as really, there is a needle going into your skin, repeatedly , at high speed - can that ever be pleasant?! We will just have to see!

It may take a little while to get all 3 done, as I will get them done at different times, after each has healed. But I will be sure to show you the pictures of them once they are complete (if you would like).

Lily x

PS: What do my readers think about tattoos? Do you find them intrusive on a lovely body, or distasteful? Or do you like that they are an expression of that person's self and of their personality? Do any of you have one (or more!)? and if so, does it symbolise anything for you? Or for those of you who don't have any art on your body, what would you have if you would get one?

Thursday, 1 May 2008

Music Therapy

My piano teacher today told me that I am too tense. In my shoulders, my back, my arms; my whole body has tensed up and it is affecting my playing. She asked if I am stressed about anything and I explained that I feel pressure when preparing pieces for a performance, but this is not really entirely true - I just didn't have a solid reason to give her ...

So what am I tense about? The fact that I am on edge everytime I hear that my irresposible, irrational, highly volatile little sister has gone out driving in a temper now that she's passed her test? That each time my parents draw one fight closer to finally separating they call me up to martial me into taking one of their sides, when they know I refuse to get involved? The unfortunate fact that my recent move to live closer to my family for the first time in my life is actually more difficult than never seeing them at all?!

No, I think in truth, the reason for my tension is that I feel, since moving to the UK, that my life has become empty. Lacking in activity and excitement and, to some extent, emotion. I was always the one who was out every night at a different ballet, art exhibition, gallery evening, theatre performance, bellydancing class, burlesque show, piano concert, friends' gatherings, dinners, restless walks around the lamplit city parks at 1 in the morning musing idly on our lives or just noting unusual artistry on the side of moonlit buildings. I have become too busy with work and concert preparation, errands and family commitments, to busy just skating through everyday life to make time for the joys I used to make time for. My vision shifted imperceptably at some point from "indulge in the joy life brings and live life like there is now tomorrow, work and chores will fit themselves in somehow", to "put in the effort and persevere to achieve your goals and pleasure will come to you soon". I don't remember where this happened and I am not at all happy that it is how I am living at the moment - For want of a better image, I seem to be waiting to eat the cake once I have baked it perfectly and left it to cool, whereas before I would have eaten most of the mixture before the cake got into the tin, which meant I had to make a few little fairy cakes instead and decorate them divinely to divert attention from the fact that they are not exactly what they were supposed to be. (This is actually truly how I bake, except when it's someone's birthday, in which case I can whip up a delightfully creamy triple chocolate gateau without getting my mouth too sticky!) But my original method is an infinitely more delicious way to go about things.

I know there is surely a balance, a middle road that allows me to bake a complete cake and eat some of the mixture along the way, I just need to will myself the discipline, because usually, once I've stuck my finger in once, and savoured that saccarine liquid on my tongue, there's no restraining me.

But I definitely need to regain my sense of self and my lust for life that seems to be escaping me at the moment. Perhaps I should take a day out from the mundane and do something exciting like zorbing, or even skydiving. That would wake me out of my rut and I've always wanted to do it.

My piano teacher's somewhat tamer prescription is that I need a serious massage and to start doing yoga.

Monday, 21 April 2008


I really am sorry about the incredible lack of posts over the last couple of weeks - I have been tremendously busy with work and on top of that, there has been a wedding/blessing, 3 birthdays, a golden aniversary and a DMT + trampolining meet. Life has been very hectic!

But I am back now and can share with you all the delights of the first few appointments that I have had the past 2 weeks ...

I'd like to say thank you to everyone who has emailed me and who have been so friendly and supportive since I started blogging and escorting - both are completely new experiences for me and I was pleasantly surprised at the sense of community and friendship that exist with both, so thank you!

Lily x

Monday, 7 April 2008

Sugasm #125

The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #126? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you’re all set.

All-Nekkid Thursday courtesy of Tara Tainton.

This Week’s Picks
Filling Myself
“We too want, need, conversations in which someone listens to us and considers our needs, not just their own.”

Sex Worker Solidarity: Amanda Brooks

“There’s a lot of love among activists, even those who disagree with one another.”


“These images that come from the artistic workings of your inner soul speak to me, as mine do to you.”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
(one from the vaults)
10 Lies Pornographers Tell

Editor’s Choice

Though We’ve Never Met

More Sugasm

Join the Sugasm

See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

Friday, 28 March 2008


I was going to make a post on some ponderings I've had recently about the Devadasi, and I still intend to write it, although probably tomorrow morning now, because I have just sat down to watch 'Desperate Housewives' and suck on some deliciously creamy caramel that I boiled up because ...

... my date for saturday has just postponed.

I am disappointed, but by the sounds of it, so is he. Such is life. He has been called upon to entertain business colleagues who are down in London for a few days, and whilst I cheekily reminded him that I can look just as delightful in an evening dress as out of one, he doesn't think he will be able to behave himself and act professionally with a beautiful girl there to distract him and his little friend!

So now I start afresh. Again. And as must be evident from my previous posts, I am not yet clear on how to go about enticing my first clients, as a result of my aforementioned 'Catch 22'esque situation.

I'm afraid today's posts haven't been very exciting, maybe to the point of boring, in which case I apologise ~ as I'm sure you can tell, there has been a lot on my mind.

But my readers' patience is about to be duly rewarded, and I will leave them with a choice of which lascivious gift they would most take pleasure in reading this weekend ~ Would Lily's readers like to hear about:

1) Her little run in with the priest at her Catholic boarding school (yes, I'm afraid it is indeed true, although as you may find out ~ she didn't last there for long!)

... or would they prefer

2) The tale of Lily's naughty escapades at a secluded chateau in France, where she discovered the true value of foreign tongues?!

The decision is in your hands! x

To Blog, Or Not To Blog?

It was mentioned to Lily in an email regarding her recent post about the new website (shameless plugging, accepted!), that it should contain a link to this blog.

Lily had in fact thought about this when she set it up, but something stayed her little hand. Upon receipt of a recent email though, as it was from someone whose opinion Lily respects very much, she wrote a comment in the updates section of her site mentioning this blog, with a link attatched.

Since doing so, Lily has again had her doubts ... what if potential clients are put off by the fact that Lily airs her escorting experiences and views on sex for anyone to read?! She is, after all, only starting out and the possibility of having no clients is one that would of course have a deblitating effect on her career as an escort! Even without mentioning her clients, incidents that Lily describes in her blog may be recognised by them or, even worse, their friends/family, although considering how many people her blog reaches, this perhaps is unlikely to be an issue. But in any case, having your exploits with an escort printed and publicized could be rather disquieting, no?

But then again, Lily knows that some people are reading this, one potential client inquiring about availability even remarked that he liked the blog and what an intruiging journey he thinks Lily is on and not only that, but that he will follow it with interest. She would like to believe that others will share the same opinion.

Without a single doubt Lily is not alone in her blogging as an escort, but she am perhaps one of the few who is new to this? The only other person Lily knows of is Juliette, but as yet we are not told whether she will continue her writing when she starts to work ...

Lily had hoped that as her journey unfolds, it would make for pleasurable reading. She is also entirely confident in her ability for the utmost discretion, in her work and whilst keeping the readers entertained with any intruiging tales and salacious escapades that may occur, thus maintaining the integrity of her blog and of her clients. Lily also likes to indulge herself and think that perhaps anyone who has decided, for whatever reason, that they can't book Lily for a little liaison, might like to enjoy her erotic skills through her blogospheric presence!

It has even been suggested by some that Lily's little corner of the web-surfing world could be useful in self-marketing. But due to her apparent lack of marketing skills (something that really should be addressed!), Lily is not sure how she would implement this.

The other question then is whether, if she continues the blog, should Lily mention it to clients? This would allow them the chance to decry or embrace the idea of being a part of her story. Lily doesn't ever intend to include names, details, even the locations of her trysts, she simply enjoys writing about her experiences.

It would sadden Lily enormously to have to relinquish this blog because all she wants it to be, in essence, is a collection of musings on life, sexuality and their related pleasures. I suppose, as the old saying goes, that only time will tell ... x

On Becoming an Escort

Lily has already briefly mentioned her ideas about marketing and some thoughts on business cards, but even before responses were received, she had realised that they are not in any way a good idea ... lets put it down to first week jitters!

But now that the website is up and running (albeit without photos yet, but we will simply gloss over that issue for the moment) she has started to consider the commercial components or her chosen path more carefully.

As she's sure her readers have noticed by now, marketing is not an area in which Lily has much experience ... when writing articles for newspapers or submitting poetry for publication, there is not much action that needs to be taken in order to promote yourself ~ you let your creative talents do the work for you.

Advertising in the industry seems to pose quite a challenge for those who don't wish to compete with the 34DD breasts which are filling up the space in the ad slot next to yours. Not that Lily is implying that there is anything wrong with this if that is what you are looking for, it is just that there appear to be plenty of sites for escorts to advertise on, but very few for high-end courtesans who provide that little bit extra, which is what Liy would like to offer. She has come across a couple of 'Elite Escort' sites, but these pose another problem ~ Lily is, quite clearly, not an established escort and so has no references to provide them with. Bunnies of London has a separate application process for high end escorts and are the only people Lily has found who wish to meet you instead of relying on references, but they seem to be an agency and Lily is not wholly convinced yet that she wants to go down this route. But she applied anyway and is open to meeting them, so please let me know, anyone, if you have any experience or knowledge of them.

Presumably, but do correct me if I am mistaken, word of mouth plays a very important role in an escort's career. The big question though is how does one stimulate this? It is in effect a mini catch 22 ~ without recommendations, clients do not get in contact. But without clients, there is no-one to make a recommendation.

It also doesn't help that Lily has no professional photos to provide and promote herself with; perhaps she will just have to be patient and accept that she cannot really begin her career until she has them, as Lily is quite aware of how important they are. On the other hand, most high class escorts that Lily has noticed show few, if any pictures on their sites, so maybe she is not at a disadvantage in this manner?

For the moment, Lily has a simple ad on punternet with links to her website, and a listing on Captain69. She has also introduced herself on the punterlink forum and intends on engaging in the site, although without getting involved in the heated 'discussions' that seem to abound there!

And then there is the issue of 'donations'; whilst Lily doesn't want to scare people off with unreasonably high rates, she does want to filter out those who just want a quick screw, to put it crudely. Lily considers that she is not your common escort, not only because of her experience in many different and often unusual ways of giving incredible pleasure, but also because she is fluent in a few different languages, has a degree in French Literature and is a concert pianist. Along with the fact that she has spent the entirety of her short life travelling the world, thanks to her parents' diplomatic professions and her own intrepidation, and you have a pretty little parcel capable of wit, charm and an experience that will always be exciting and distinctive. It should also be mentioned that due to Lily's adventurous nature, she would always endeavour to indulge most requests and suggestions. These reasons, as I hope readers would agree, justify higher rates for Lily's time, although she is still reluctant to put her pricing at a premium for fear that she might never receive any interest, and she does wonder if perhaps starting a little lower and working her way up works in this business as it does in others?

It is probably true that Lily will just have to bite the bullet, stop dallying and commit, and she does indeed know this.

Alora, another day another issue ... rest assured that Lily will be writing something a little more interesting later, when she leaves her last day at the office desk. Yay! x

Wednesday, 26 March 2008

Step Back, Step Forward

Lily's poor graphic designer friend has gone and contracted glandular fever, so will not be able to work on her website for quite a while.

Whilst Lily is of course concerned for his health, sweet soul that he is, this poses the dilemma that she is without any page for longer than she would like. Today she hurriedly span through the labyrinthine pathways of the internet ... and stumbled accross a little gem ... an entirely free webspage hosting site, exclusively tailored to escorts. Can this be true? she wondered to herself as she registered slightly apprehensively, only to be prompted to choose her very own, personal domain name. She couldn't believe her luck and decided on the one which seemed to suit her best ~

After hours of entering content and playing with the templates and options, the result is a temporary website which, I am sure you will all agree, is much more appealing than the generic myspace page that Lily had to start out with!

She even gets her own banner to link to:

Lily Valentina

The next event to look forward to is the photo shoot, but this is not for another week or so, meaning impatient Lily is going to have to cope without those ever important photos for a little longer.

Lily does have a couple of amateur photos she took herself a little while back and she is tempted to put these up on her site until she has her professional ones because she knows that potential clients like to have an idea of appearances before they make contact. But Lily is worried that these pictures might lower her tone as they are not exactly professional! But as she is somewhat of a perfectionist at times, she isn't sure if other people think that it actually matters?!

As you can imagine, Lily is all very excited about this and would appreciate her readers' impressions and feedback if they care to do so, as since meeting a few of you on here, she values your opinions very much!

x x x

Sunday, 23 March 2008

Why Oh Why?

Lily didn't realise it would happen so soon, but she has been expecting it ...

That someone, at some point, would take it upon themselves to make life unpleasant for her in some way, believing that the fact Lily takes money for sex allows them to try to manipulate her as they like, because they see her as a worthless, money-hungry whore.

First it was an email from a guy who said he liked Lily's ad, could he make an appointment? But after a little while, he had decided her rates were too expensive. Fine - Lily is not for everybody. Polite end of conversation.

Later he writes again to demand she sends a picture of her face and phone number. Lily ignores it.

What ensues is a barrage of messages asking why she would expect anyone to pay her rates without ever having met them or seen them properly first when there are thousands of other girls he can shag for same money and what is so special about Lily?! That Lily is a bad businesswoman not to engage with him as she would have to look like these girls (cue links to various escorts' profiles) to command such money, claiming he knows everyone who has contacted her and that he will do what he can to make it very difficult - that he doesn't like her and he needs to protect the GENUINE girls out there as he is responsible for many of the clients here, etc, etc ...

According to him, Lily has picked a bad person to annoy,
"you frigid piece of crap"

How lovely.

Why is it that some people feel this need to make life unpleasant for others they don't even know? What is their purpose and can they honestly not have anything more worthwhile to do with themselves? It all just seems so pointless.

At first Lily was upset, then angry, but now she is just resigned to the fact that she may be being badmouthed on boards she doesn't know about, before she has even started working properly!

How our decisions are tested sometimes ...

Lily x

Rolling Balls

So after much deliberation, perhaps more than neccesary, as to which I should choose, I have placed my profile with an escorting website and have already made my first booking ...

... for Saturday, in case anybody was interested(!).

Responses have been surprisingly polite and mostly genuine, with fewer timewasters than I anticipated! I don't think I will keep my ad there very long, as it is not really how I want to go about things, but until I get started, it will suffice.

Now all that remains is for me to complete the last week of my current job and make sure I am prepared for anything and everything - Now is where it really starts ...

I'll keep you posted on how it all unfolds, if you wish to follow my story. For the moment, I am just excited and apprehensive.

Lily x

Saturday, 22 March 2008

A Long Awaited Meeting

She stepped from the train, glancing calmly behind to see if you stood on the platform, she didn’t know where to expect you. As she walked towards the stairs she looked up while negotiating the steps in her stilettos – your favourites, high, black with gold trim and gilt metal doves on the sides – and saw you stood there, your old coat turned up against the expected chill, chocolate eyes turned towards her in anticipation. She waved a shy greeting and continued down, heart fluttering just at your presence.

‘You look beautiful’
‘Thank you,’
‘I should have made an effort - you’ve made feel scruffy now’
‘No, I like it when you don’t shave’

Never had she told you how she prefers the days when you show up to work with a dark shadow outlining your sharp jaw line, contrasting with your smooth latte skin and transforming your laughing eyes into deep pools of intensity. Then with a second glance she realises you meant the simple white t-shirt and cargos you’ve thrown on, an escape from the usual.


Hours later, sitting on the bed behind her as she leans over the table to retrieve your headphones, you reach forward and lift the hem of her dress, gazing at the creamy round buttocks presented pertly before you as she slowly straightens up and turns around to smile coyly at your cheekiness. She sits again at the keyboard and plays out a few phrases. Just as she starts to ask what you think, you are behind her, your hand slipping into the top of her dress, flicking her nipple as you reach to massage her ready breast.

‘So now you’re getting horny’, leaning back she turns and looks up at you.
‘I’ve been turned on since I saw you step of that train’ you reply, moving your hand across to enjoy the other side, reaching closer, your breath warm and sweet against her bare neck.

You lead her up out of the soft leather and towards you where you stand in the centre of the room. Facing each other the air is still and fragile in anticipation of this long awaited moment – her timidity makes her wait for you to give her the permission for that which she has waited months for … at your gentle smile and almost imperceptible nod, she lifts her dress over her head to reveal the slim, toned body you have traced beneath her clothes at work; the smooth tanned skin you have stroked in stolen moments when you passed each other at the bar; the small but full breasts and large dark nipples you have so often imagined from her beautiful silhouette. Calmly you bring her towards you; hooking a finger into her black scallop-edged thong you pull it gently down and toss it onto the floor when she steps out. You drop to your knees and delicately peel off her nude stockings, caressing her calves as you do so. Straightening up, you take her hand, falling slowly onto the bed with her small frame enveloped in your strong embrace. You kiss her for the first time, tongue gentle against her giving lips, but it is not enough and you move your mouth down to her neck, her shoulder, her chest before taking a hard nipple in your teeth, savouring every mouthful of her musky taste you lick, bite, suck her supple skin as your bodies entwine, each aching for immediate satisfaction of your lusting senses.

Finally you flip her over, pulling her ass upwards and back into you, your cock ready, you spread her cheeks and exhale in awe, your every dream embodied here in this moment as you gaze down at her glistening, expectant cunt.

'Beautiful, such a pretty little pussy, ... ' you muse, stroking it gently, you grab her hips and ease yourself into her, savouring each second of sensation, amazed that you are finally here, at last inside her sweet body, she moans in tune to your reverie. Your hands pull her back again and again, thrusting in and in, slowly at first as she gets used to you, then more aggressively.

‘Arch your back baby, arch it for me’

She raises her buttocks, arching her back into those primal contours you love so much.

‘That’s it, there, hold it there, ohh’.

You grasp her neck in your strong grip and turn her face to look into yours, she moans with pleasure, her mouth parted slightly with each breath, a wry smile playing across her lips as she enjoys taking in your expressive eyes. You hold her there, intent that she should see what you are doing to her, but her head slips out from between your hands, she tries to hold the position, tries to please you, turns to look as far around as she can without your help.

‘Look at your shadow, look at that, look at the sensuous shape you’re throwing into the shadow, look at me in you, baby, look at that, that's your silhouette, you are doing that, don’t you like how you look baby?’

She bites her lip and smiles in agreement, silently pleased that she finally succumbed to the incessant pressure you placed on her, pressure to let you taste her charms, to indulge your ache for her delightfully pure body.

Now she spasms, small sharp intakes of breath, her hips pulling away from you in jagged movements then resting back against you briefly before jerking away from you again, repeatedly.

‘Please tell me that was lots of little ones …’ you murmur.
‘Mmmm …’ she purrs, lifting herself up to lean her back against you, reaching across to stroke your cheek whilst she nibbles the opposite earlobe and kisses the skin on the side of your neck. You stroke her thighs, her waist, her breasts, taking in as much of her as you can with just two hands, stroking, caressing, your fingers dancing over her curves.

'Good girl' you soothe, warm breath and lips brushing against her temple, before slowly lowering her body, arranging her limbs how you want them below your admiring stare.

You continue, pausing and pulling out every now and then to admire her dripping wet pussy, angled so finely for you to gaze at. You calmly massage and separate her buttocks, pushing them apart to open up her ass and her glistening slit. You cannot resist licking her juices. She squirms, pushing backwards, yearning for you to enter her again, and you concede, thrusting harder this time you grab her hair with one hand and pull her head back roughly towards you, slapping her taut muscles firmly with the other palm – she gasps with delight, you hit more sharply, this time resting your hand there to massage her butt cheek, now gripping it, stretching it outwards to watch yourself moving inside her sweet form.

‘You’re doing so good baby, taking it like a soldier, oh, my little soldier girl …’ you tell her as you push her head sharply down into the mattress, causing her pert backside to rise in that refined shape.

She pushes herself up again, onto her elbows, hands out in front, crouched there like a languid little sphinx for you and you alone.

You don’t like it when she doesn’t stay put; ‘Show me how I like it’

She moves her legs to position herself.

‘Is that how I like it?’

At your commanding tone she raises her ass, lowers her shoulders slightly and arches her back, struggling to find the position you are expecting. You laugh, a low, self-indulgent chuckle that makes her feel clumsy and inept as you manipulate her, pulling her hips up higher and her legs closer together. You hold her into you as you pause for a moment, eyeing her hot skin, flushed with exertion and arousal. Oh, she is doing so well. Pushing down firmly on the small of her back you move with a renewed force, faster, almost violent, ravaging her tiny frame, determined to keep her like this until you empty yourself at last into her cunt. Her breathing becomes uneven, she begins to take loud, shallow breaths as a guttural, animalistic moan rises up in her throat and she grinds back onto you, reaching out to take as much of you in as she can, shuddering as the convulsions ripple through up through her body.

Smug, you groan at the release you finally permit yourself now that she has sated her own appetite. Digging your nails into her flawless skin in your elation you draw five tiny spots of rich crimson blood, marking her as your own.

To Be Continued .....

Sweet Sigh

I feel every piece of music I hear, every note I play, every beat that pulses through the air, I feel every layer. A piece of music can make me laugh out with pure, anadulterated joy or bring tears to my eyes at the pain it invokes ... music is my everything.

Whilst playing Chopin's 'Sospiro' this morning, I suddenly realised how it is the musical incarnation of an orgasm. Not those sudden explosions of passion, but the ones that creep up on you in slow intense waves, radiating softly out from your core until they reach your toes, causing them to curl and flex and you feel that the pleasure is too much for you to bear, that all you are is writhing at the mercy of this pulsating nub at the centre of your body ... when it realeases you it is not once, but in convulsion after sweet shuddering convulsion, over and over, every nerve ending burning, on fire, ripple after ripple of molten heat, engulfing your body in it's relentless embrace until it finally allows your skin to cool down, gradually relaxing in a satisfied pool of sodden, breathless relief.

I wanted to share with you, how I felt as my fingers stroked each inspired note of Chopin's aptly named 'Sigh'.

Lily x

Tuesday, 18 March 2008

What To Do ... ?

As Lily stood in the shower this morning, letting the scalding water stream over her neck and shoulders to run in swift rivulets around breasts and nipples, down to a little bellybutton where it swirled gracefully before flowing away under her feet, she contemplated her business plan ...

... and wasn't at all surprised to realise that she doesn't have one. Because that has always been her way - doing before thinking. Lily has a high regard for the primacy and validity of human passions and its role on man’s life and I suppose this reflects itself in her highly impulsive nature.

So the website is in the capable hands of her graphic designer friend who is "constructing" it out of complex formulae and a language of codes which Lily has no hope of ever understanding, a photo-shoot session has been booked for after Easter with an acquaintance at London School of Fashion whose graduation project is, fortuitously, on tasteful artistic nudes, and rates have been decided upon, after much perusal of discussions on this matter. Can there be anything missing?

Ah yes. The small matter of marketing.

Lily would never be silly enough to think that as soon as she began her venture, men from all corners of the globe would be dashing to their phones to call and arrange appointments. No, unfortunately the world doesn't quite work like that.

So Lily thought about business cards - they would be easy enough to produce and leave 'lying about' in appropriate opportune environments. The venue to leave them in would have to be carefully considered to attract the necessary type of clientele. But would they actually be seen by anybody? And if so, could they inspire an initial interest in some of those people who they are noticed by? On top of this, for those men who are seeking a courtesan in addition to their wife and/or family it is not really so discreet to have the escort's card in your wallet. But then again, if designed correctly, it could be just any other business card ... but this then leads back to the fact that they might not be recognised in the first place ... oh the dilemma!

If anyone has any conclusions, they would gratefully received! x

Saturday, 15 March 2008

Time Out ... To Explore

I would like to share with you some of the timid treats that, 'quelle surprise!' an incredibly coincidental issue of Time Out Magazine has provided us with this month ...

I first discovered their array of delights when I followed on a link on another webpage about how to lead a double life when you have your own secret hidden world. But I didn't finish the article as my sight was soon attracted to a far more interesting link at the side on double penetration - ooooh delights! we meet a first timer! We also have an introduction to 'splosh' (for those of you more versed in these types of shenanigans ... have you seen the Splosh Website recently?!) There's also a woman who tells of when she wanted to try out a fucking machine and many more people chronicling their fetishes and new experiences.

Just a little reminder that we should all try new things every once in a while, branch out of our comfort zones and test out our tastebuds!

I haven't read all of the articles, and a lot of them are really quite tame ... but there is the odd one that will surprise you ...

I will keep this post short and sweet, sometimes a good thing ;) -as I don't want to waste your precious exploration time, but allow me to share with you just one more thing ...

"SiFeet Pussy Foot is the ultimate fantasy sex toy for foot fetishists. This size 6, 100% silicone foot is cast in pure silicone from a real life actual, beautiful female foot. In the sole of this lovely foot is a fully functional and totally fuck-able silicone vagina."

- Enjoy!

Lily x
P.S.. I would be excited to hear comments or emails about some of my readers' sexy little explorations and any interesting sites to peruse would be most welcome!

Friday, 14 March 2008

Flitting About

I was surprised to find, on reading my favourite blogs this lunchtime, that Ex-Courtesan Gillette had written an eloquently insightful post about what monogamy means to her, because in the dark hours of thursday night exacly the same strands of thought were wisping though my sleep clouded mind ...

Whilst lazing in bed and grazing on grapes and shortbread of an evening, as one does(!), I had a call from a good friend of mine, who in fact I haven't actually known for that long. We engage in a lot of indepth conversations and tend to share similar views on many a provocative topic. Especially alike are our ideas about how to conduct relationships with men. Last night was no different, and after a while the talk moved to her current despair at the male population (which is understandable as she recently suffered an unexpected betrayal). To support a particuclar point she was making, my friend asked, with the intention of a rhetorical question as she was sue I would agree, to pretend for a moment that I am married - would I be ok with my imaginary husband sleeping with another woman?

- Yes, I replied, as long as he shared it with me.
She paused.
- But wouldn't you hate that he felt the need to have sex with someone else? Wouldn't that make you feel insecure?
- No. You can't get everything you need emotionally from one person. Thats why we have different friends and colleagues and partners. Besides, you can't have a relationship with double standards, can you.
- What double standard?
- Well I can't conduct relationships with other people and forbid him from doing the same! Thats just rude!
- But why would you be sleeping with other people?!
- Why wouldn't I be?!
- Because you have a husband! Why do you need relationships with other men when you married somebody who you thought was the perfect person for you!
- Because different people fulfil different needs and appeal to different parts of your nature ... you can't get everything from one person. *a little aside*
- But why would you jeapardise your relationship and, most of all, neglect the time and effort you put into your children just for a guy that doesn't even mean anything to you? That is just completely selfish! How can you say it's ok to betray them like that?

By this point, I felt the need to remind her that it was a hypothetical situation which is unlikely to ever arise because, actually, I don't believe in marriage because I am an atheist and I also don't have any children just yet! That calmed her down a bit as she fumed silently, but I too was now shocked because it seemed to me that in my friend's eyes, polyamourousness (what is the correct word for this?!) clambours into bed with neglect and deceipt of those who we love. I can see from my fairly flippant and un-thoughtout responses that yes, what I was implying did seem selfish - that I wanted as much as I could get of what pleases me. But then again, so what? And it was this which sparked Ex-Coutesan Gillette to pen this lovely, more thought-out post here, on the very topic of selfishness.

Now to be honest, I haven't cast my ideas in iron just yet ... which would explain why they are somewhat inarticulate when voiced ... I am not confident that I have an entirely coherent or even backed-up argument ... which brings me to another thought - in matters of the heart, is it necessary to validate our decisions to ourselves? Western philosophy is largely based on a Greek tradition of science and reason which, whether we like it or not, will always inform our thoughts and actions. [a bit like being an atheist with a catholic background - I may not believe in god, but I damn well know I'm going to hell for it!] For the sake of others, perhaps, but for ourselves - that is more complicated.

It is no coincidence that on perusal of a couple of english language dictionaries, the only synonyms I can find for monogamy are chastity and marriage and that adultery, lewdness, nymphomania and promiscuity are the only antonyms provided. No wonder us 'polyamours' are considered by many to be being unfaithful to our partners. And no doubt among those who have subscribed to a life of committed partnership with one sole other, to take part in plurial relationships would not be faithful to the agreement they made. But in a situation where both parties are open about their values and intentions, like in the relationships I have engaged in, to engage with other partners would be in fact remaining true to the mutual agreement, n'est pas?

I did feel I should add something more substantial to the little comment I made in response to Ex-Courtesan Gillette, even if it has become quite tangled in the process of trying to write everything down in clearheaded manner! En effet, I suppose I was simply trying to concur with The Recovering Voice.

It just seems to me that somewhere, at some moment in time, someone altered the common consciousness to accept that it is a virtue to strive for mental and emotional fulfilment in all parts of our lives, with the exception of sexual relationships. The attitudes of both men and women from all walks of life in this, the 21st century, towards sex honestly astound me... but lets not get me started on that for now ... !


As a newcomer to these parts, allow me to enlighten you a little about myself ...

I am 22, 5'9", 32B, size 8-10 (UK). I am the mixed race daughter of 2 entirely disparate cultures - tribal Africa and conservative Anglo-Saxon, thus my luscious locks are dark and curly, framing eyes of big bright blue. This in itself is a clue that I have managed to create a life for myself in which their contrasting elements tentatively balance and somehow fuse to allow two different worlds to gracefully co-exist. With my family I flitted from sea to sea and so have never lived anywhere for longer than 3 years. But on my travels through citadels as far and wide as Morocco, Jordan and India to Malaysia, Australia, Zambia and Botswana I have encountered an array of colourful characters without whose influences I would not be the person I am today.

Like I said, I have spent the most part of my life travelling.
I have been told I am a perpetual aesthete, though it is true that I take pleasure in all forms of beauty; words and water, fire and flowers.
I am a writer, I am a musician.
I am passionate about literature and poetry - be it avant garde french works, feminist writings, folklore, ancient myths, 19th century romanticism, medieval poetry, fairytales. John Donne, Carol Ann Duffy, Angela Carter, Marguerite Duras, Rumi, Marquis de Sade, Salmon Rushdie, William Dalrympole, Albert Camus, Chinua Achebe, Anon.
I love glancing at the stars as a solitary cloud floats across a dark night, and watching dragonflies land on my toes in yellow grass fields.
I love the textures of silk, lace, petals, creamy skin, goat hide, soft down, creases in lips, juicy earlobes, gleaming locks of soft dark hair, leaves under a bare foot, the smell of rain in the desert.

As a result of my constant voyaging (or perhaps due to the fact that to be monolinguistic would be inconceivable to my mother as she speaks 7 languages) I speak good French and a couple of other mostly-unheard-of-except-to-scholars african dialects. It also means that I am always open to new experiences. In fact I doubt I could survive in a stagnant environment ... I thrive on change and renewal, and start to get restless after spending a prolonged period of time in any one place or condition, but I have never known any other way of life and am content to float with the winds ...

Thursday, 13 March 2008


I think that at heart, and of course to varying degrees, there are some people who are naturally 'feminists' and some who aren't. One can alter and amend one's morals and beliefs to adhere to a philosophy that you have decided makes sense to your life, but peoples' instinctual perspectives will always and inescapably veer towards one plane or another.

I guess you explain it like food: I love vegetables. Cabbage, green beans, lettuce, sundried tomatoes, eggplant, zucchini, cucumber, leeks ... I’ll eat them all. Except mushrooms - these I despise above anything else. I have no valid reason for this feeling of utmost disgust towards a plant that has never done anything wrong to me and in fact adds a quite delectable flavour to stews and stroganoffs, but I cannot put them in my mouth. It is not a matter of personal choice, but of natural predisposition and no matter what anyone has tried, I am unable to like mushrooms. I can tell people I do and I can eat foods that contain them, but really. I hate mushrooms.

So I believe it is with your own personal 'philosophy'. There are some of us who, without any inclination, or even awareness, of doing so, hold in our individual set of morals and beliefs that are as much a part of our personality as which colours we prefer, values and fundamental principles that would have so called "female liberators" rushing over and hugging us for "taking control of our own minds and bodies". But 'feminists' have always existed, throughout the ages. Many women may have 'seen the light' or 'awakened their sexuality' with the help of modern social movements, and this did help a lot of women truly liberate themselves from oppressive situations. But the fact of the matter is that since the Middle Ages and before, there have always been 'feminist' females who held the same, if not stronger, ideals as their modern counterparts. You cannot change the fact that some don't believe that humans are inherently monogamous, and never have done. Or that whilst many of us consider our bodies to be 'sacred vessels', some will indulge it in activities perfectly acceptable to them which others would find abhorent. Or that some peoples' views on women and sex will never be reconciled with those on the other side of the table.

Wednesday, 12 March 2008

Lily Cordially Invites You ...

I was never a normal child. Even my mother always told me that, but she didn't need to; I knew it for myself. I took the clothes off all my Barbies and wrapped her in lace instead and hated watching Scooby-Doo. I read Albert Camus, Jules Verne, Marquis de Sade, Sati and Ursula Le Guin and understood the socio-political nuances in each. Whilst my friends shopped for sweets and puzzles, I lusted after silk stockings, vintage jewelled hatpins and delicate underwear. I wore subtle eyeliner and tinted lip balm in place of the usual glittery eyeshadows and garish nail polishes. I had a fascination of female sexuality and sex. When I was about 11 the craze in the school playground one summer was marbles. I played it every now and then but failed to be riveted by the rarity index of the different sizes and throwing those pretty little glass balls at walls just didn't do it for me. Instead, I put a few up inside of me in the shower one morning and wandered around all day amazed at the feeling of those pretty little glass balls massaging my vaginal walls.

I haven't ever felt that I live in the right place. My views on life, how I interpret people and situations, even how my tastes and decisions are informed, what I believe about relationships, all seem ill at ease with the society in which I exist. It seems unnecessarily complex to explain, so I shan't, but suffice it to say - I see no wrong in taking money for giving a sexual experience. In fact, I think it is a valuable tradition that is greatly overlooked in our society. We pay for please in other forms of pleasure and entertainment so why, in a 'liberated' western society, should sex be any different? There is arguably more taboo surrounding the sex industry and even, on occasion, casual sex in this century then there has ever been, despite the fact that everyone is telling each other (and themselves) that we are freer than ever before. Ha.

I had entertained the idea of being some sort of courtesan from the age of about 9. The idea that the job itself existed on a concept of social transgression enticed me alone. But it was more than that. It is about passion, pleasure, delighting the senses, the mystique of character, challenging each other and oneself, the exploration of self and form, erotic artistry and the beauty of the spirit. It is about invloving each other in the playful essence of life.

Anyway, this post was not supposed to be about all the above. It was supposed to be an invitation. An invitation to join me on a voyage of experience and discovery. A voyage that begins with me, in London, in the spring of a new year. A spring which, for once, will fulfil its intentions of growth and renewal with the cultivation of a different Lily. One who blooms out of her previous habit of uneasily conforming to what is expected of girls of a certain age and who finally embraces her own hopes, wishes, ambitions and desires. A Lily who finally lives up to her own expectations of herself.

This is an invitation to share with me the highs the lows of my new life in London as a social escort and courtesan.